Wedding Etiquette For Cancelled Weddings

The worst nightmare of any couple is the cancelled wedding. Despite months of preparation, things can still go wrong even at the moment of saying “ I do” From a cheating partner to having the extreme case of cold feet, one must remember to maintain wedding etiquette throughout the entire ordeal.

Depending on the seriousness of a cancelled wedding, one can still turn a failed occasion into a positive one. An obvious wedding etiquette procedure is to inform the family and guests that there will be no wedding celebration. If the wedding is cancelled a few days before the actual ceremony, sending cards to family and friends announcing the broken engagement is a suitable wedding etiquette.

All arrangements made for the wedding date itself should be cancelled. Some companies will ask for payment, an amount that could be equal to the preparations taken by the supplier. It is a wedding etiquette to handle all this with grace and finesse.

However, if the cancellation happens on the wedding date itself, the announcement must be made verbally and as soon as possible to avoid public humiliation. The family should use the wedding etiquette of comforting the one left at the altar and make it a point to shield him or her from other people since this is a sad situation.

Gift wedding etiquette should be followed. This means all the wedding gift items will be returned, including cash, appliances or properties. It will be hard to do but at least the aggrieved party will not be accused of impoliteness.

When calling off a wedding, it really is a proper wedding etiquette to do it months before the wedding date. That is what pre-marriage counseling is for. The wedding etiquette dictates that all couples should take marriage seminars to make sure that they are prepared emotionally and mentally for the huge responsibility ahead.

A broken engagement is embarrassing as it is but as a wedding etiquette, you have the freedom not to question the couple why they decided not to continue with the wedding. And being the couple, you also have the right not to tell anyone until you feel you are ready.

Not all broken engagements happen because of a lonely partner. When a relative’s death occurs, it is proper wedding etiquette to cancel the wedding. This shows wedding etiquette in respect to the deceased’s family and expresses sincere sorrow.

Proper wedding etiquette is to allow six months to pass before attempting to walk down the aisle again. And even if the couple decides to wed two to three months after the death in the family, one must be ready to simplify the ceremony to observe wedding etiquette.

Engagements broken by family members also happen. If this occurs, try to resolve the matter as discretely a possible. Wedding etiquette dictates that only the couple can decide on canceling the weeding or postponing it to a later date.

When a partner is left cold on the altar:

Things can become worse but you can also turn it into a positive one. If the wedding reception has been paid for, the person who paid for it can use the reception and continue on with the party for the guests’ benefit. Wedding etiquette may not require the aggravated person to attend but it is a better way to forget the embarrassment.

When the cancelled wedding occurs out of town, it is an important wedding etiquette to have a clear head and sort out the pre-made plans of the wedding. Things like the honeymoon trip and the hotel accommodations must be taken cared of. If the aggrieved party has paid for the trip, he or she can choose to take it as a getaway and period of reflection.


Bouncing back from the broken engagement:

The first few weeks are the toughest to face. Be prepared to here the question why? And what happened? a lot. Wedding etiquette dictates that you have to face these people with a smile and offer as little detail as possible.

As attractive as the sound of revenge is, you must try to keep an open mind and be as civil about everything a possible. Remember that this person once had an important part of your life and part of a wedding etiquette is to respect their decision.

The Shower And Stag Wedding Etiquette

Being the maid of honor and the best man have a number of wedding etiquette duties. This includes the church responsibilities of handling the train, making sure that everyone is in their place and hosting the reception program.

One of the important duties for any maid of honor and best man is to arrange for the bridal shower and stag party. Wedding etiquette for showers or stags can be done separately or together. It is a traditional wedding etiquette for the bridesmaids to have their own celebration as well as the groomsmen for their stag party.

For the bridal shower:

Women have more finesse when it comes to bridal shower parties. The wedding etiquette for such events may require the maid of honor to come up with original ideas for the shower. The first thing to consider is the format. The wedding etiquette for formats can be from the formal (a dinner) or informal (strip club party).

Aside from that, there are other alternatives like going to the spa, spending a party at the circus or whatever the maid of honor thinks that the bride will appreciate. A bridal shower is thrown in honor of the bride and her friendship with the girls. Wedding etiquette only calls for all the bridesmaid’s help in organizing it and making it memorable.

A proper bridal shower observes the wedding etiquette of a program. A simple one will do. Depending on the theme, the program starts off with an introduction of the bride’s friends, a round of games for everyone, the gift giving (if any) and then dinner.

Gifts for the bridal shower are optional but are a great wedding etiquette to follow. The bride’s friends can chip in for one extravagant gift or each of them can bring a piece for the bride. The wedding etiquette gift for bridal showers can be as tame as matching monogrammed towels to something naughty like lingerie.

The wedding etiquette for games is to celebrate it as a fun reminder of the bride’s single days or something about her current relationship. It is acceptable to have games purely for fun. But what the maid of honor has to remember is the shower giveaways.

Already considered as an art form, the giveaways or gift bags are a wedding etiquette must have. The bags should contain a souvenir (any object of choice chosen by the maid of honor), a thank you card for making the event and maybe a picture of the couple for remembrance. Yes it sounds corny but it is about the bride and groom.

Another wedding etiquette to remember is the timing of the bridal shower. An event like this should be celebrated weeks before the wedding date. This will allow the bride enough time to relax and truly enjoy the shower. And should she get drunk then, there is a lot of time to recover from the hang over.

For the best man:

A stag party is usually celebrated weeks before the wedding celebration. It is bad wedding etiquette to hold it the day before the ceremony. Things can go wrong what that happens. Imagine the groom arriving with a big headache.

All the stag party is concerned is the budget of the event. If the best man can get as much funding from the other groomsmen, the event can go well underway. Most wedding etiquette for a stag party is not followed but the concept is there.

Hosting is a wedding etiquette that the best man has to perform. Unlike the bridal shower, this process is very informal. The hosting job may only go as far as introducing the other groomsmen and then inviting in the strippers.

The wedding etiquette of providing food and drinks still apply though. If the stag party is held at the hotel, room service can be ordered up to their room. If they decide to celebrate in a bar, the menu is easily available to them.

The groomsmen can get as frisky as they want with the hired strippers but as a wedding etiquette rule, the groom should have self-control. The saying look but don’t touch applies. Or if it is unavoidable, touch but don’t squeeze will do.

Stag parties are different from bridal showers because men view this as their last hurrah. The most important wedding etiquette rule or both parties is to never ask what transpired that night. It will only open up suspiciousness and could cancel a wedding. Brides, just be glad that your man made it to the altar. By him showing up there and meeting you means that nothing further happened.

Wedding Etiquette For Brides

Whether we admit it or don't Wedding Etiquette is still an important issue to many of us. Don't you hear yourself complaining for some weddings that you have attended? Maybe you have heard some friends who have attended a wedding ceremony and learning after the rites that he or she was not invited for the wedding reception.

Although it is acceptable and is within the Wedding Etiquette standard to invite some guests only at the wedding reception and some only at the wedding reception, the guests should be informed of this fact before hand. These instances want us to shout: Learn some manners!

For brides out there who are getting married next year, it will be for your own good if you would buy Emily Post's book on Wedding Etiquette. It will teach you the Wedding Etiquette basics and Wedding Etiquette blunders. Knowing what violates and follows Wedding Etiquette will help you go through your big day, hassle and stress free.

Basic Wedding Etiquette for Brides

- On what to wear.

Modern Wedding Etiquette allows brides to wear any design that she want in any color. Brides are not anymore limited to wearing ultra white wedding dress with sleeves. They may wear a tube, halter or spaghetti strapped wedding dress in cream beige or pastel colors.

But for the sake of Wedding Etiquette, she should also consider her cultural background and her church's dress requirement. If your church requires you to wear a shawl over a tube wedding dress, then you must do so.

If the minister or priest thinks that your red wedding dress is inappropriate for the church and ask you to replace your $10,000 designer wedding dress for a white wedding dress, then you should take it off and buy a white ready-to-wear wedding gown at Macy's.

- On who to invite.

It is a basic Wedding Etiquette for a bride to talk to her groom on who and who are not to invite. Remember that the is the two of you who will get married, not only you. It will be a violation of Wedding Etiquette if you will invite persons your groom do not want to get invited or do not want to see, such as your old flame or his old boss that he had an argument even though you are in speaking terms with his old boss. It is not just about Wedding Etiquette, it is in fact about the issue of respect.

If it is your second marriage, you should not invite your ex-spouse or your ex-parents-in-law. Even if you are in good terms with your ex, Wedding Etiquette dictates that you should not invite them. This is to avoid unnecessary confrontations or wedding drama. Your guest will also feel uncomfortable around your ex.

But there is an exception to this Wedding Etiquette. If your children to your ex-spouse has requested for the presence of their father, then you should talk about it with your groom. If he agrees, then invite your ex to your wedding. But there is an alternative to this, however.

You can invite your guest for a dinner at your home after your wedding or honeymoon. This private dinner is more quiet and will save you the trouble of explaining to your father and mother and other close guests why your ex-husband is in your wedding.

- On gift giving and registry.

It is a big Wedding Etiquette no-no to ask for cash gifts from your guests. Although it is a reality that newlyweds need cash as a startup money since they need to rent a bigger place or buy new appliances that the two of them needs, you don't want to look like a greedy bride for asking for some cash.

Let them decide what to give. If they have decided to give you cash, then say your thanks. But don't ever ask them to fund a mortgage or fund a charity that you will establish as a wedding gift.

Registry card is acceptable although modern Wedding Etiquette objects to insertion of the registry card in the invitation. Wedding Etiquette specialists say that brides should put up an online registry card and inform your guests through your invitation that you have an online registry and they may want to look it up in case they would decide to buy you gifts from your registry.

Wedding Etiquette For A Second Marriage

What if your heart beats again for the second time? Scary, isn't it? Many questions pop-up your mind especially now that he proposed marriage to you. The first question that your mind has formed was what is the wedding etiquette for a second marriage?

It is a tough question but it needs to be answered. Learning the wedding etiquette for a second marriage will help you lessen the pressure and tension that your first family (which you love so much) has unconsciously thrown at your back. You need to carry the situation like any sensible adult.

Before, it is a popular thought that second marriage should not be elaborate, extravagant and formal the way a first marriage is celebrated. But today, this belief does not hold true anymore. You can still aim for an intimate, smaller and quieter second marriage but you can also celebrate a festive one, if you prefer and your budget allows you to do so.

What is important is that your second marriage is celebrated the way you would want it to be. Don't limit yourself and do what others expect you to do for a second marriage. Remember, it is you who will get wed and not them. Besides, you would not violate any wedding etiquette by following your heart's desires.

Here are some information for you on wedding etiquette for a second marriage.

Wedding Etiquette for a Second Marriage - Announcing Your Engagement

In getting wed for the second time, your major concerns will be the second marriage's effect on your children, if you have any, and to your close relatives. If you plan to remarry, your children should know first of your decision. You must ready your children for having a new family and new brothers and sisters. Uniting two families will not be stressful for you but for your children, most especially.

The next to be informed are your parents. Of course, they need to be in your wedding and informing them is a sign of courtesy to them. Next will be your ex, especially if you have arranged joint custody for the children. He should know that there will be some changes in your household.

Also, you should wear your new engagement ring. There mustn't have any trace of old flames on your fingers the moment you begin planning and announcing your second wedding.

Wedding Etiquette for a Second Marriage - Dress Issue

Widow brides who are getting married for the second time are expected to wear lilac or lavender dress. But these does not hold true nowadays. Wedding etiquette for a second marriage gives bride a chance to wear white dress again. Divorced brides can also wear white dress although they could remove the veil and tiara and instead simply wear flowers on your head.

Wedding Etiquette for a Second Marriage - Who to Invite?

When planning for your second wedding, think that you can invite any person you want to attend to your wedding. Refrain from inviting former in-laws and ex-spouses, even if you are on good terms with them. Guests may also feel awkward seeing and being around them.

If your children, however, requested that their father should be in the wedding, try to talk them out about it and tell them how awkward it would feel for the new in-laws and the new groom to see an ex-spouse around. Wedding etiquette for a second marriage does not obligate you to invite an ex-spouse to your second wedding, although you may do so if the situation warranted.

But if your new groom agrees to the idea of inviting an ex-spouse as requested by the children and your ex-spouse agreed on it, then you may invite your ex-spouse to attend your second wedding.

But there is a more sensible idea than inviting your ex-spouse to your wedding. Invite him to a dinner, perhaps at your home, with your children and new husband, if he is up to it. Tell your children that the dinner replaces the wedding invitation and your children may finally agree on not inviting their father on the wedding day. You may do this before or after your wedding or honeymoon.

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Petty Situation - Bride Or Groom’s Father Has A Girlfriend

Let us have a close look on a situation - Martha was about to get married. On the wedding day, she, her mother, her bridesmaids and her father’s girlfriend went to the beauty parlor to have their hair done. Upon arrival, they have learned that only one stylist was present.

The situation created a commotion. The father’s girlfriend, being so vain and inconsiderate was the first to manage her hair done. Of course, the mom and the bridesmaids fumed in anger.

Similarly an another situation - Albert was the groom. His father has a current hot girlfriend. The girlfriend was almost of Albert’s age and is obviously just after fun. In short, it was apparent his father’s girlfriend and his dad are just having a fling. Should the girl be invited to the wedding?

There you go. Wedding situations can sometimes get really petty. If you are a bride or a groom’s father’s girlfriend, consider your position. Do not ruin some people’s precious moments. Do not settle to steal wedding thunders. Adopt a mature stance even just for the wedding occasion.

Dilemmas

The usual dilemmas brides and grooms encounter involving their father’s girlfriends and their moms will be discussed in this blog post.

Let us consider this situation. Dory’s father has a girlfriend. He threatens that he will not attend or show up at the wedding if the girlfriend will not be invited. In short, the father wants to display his sexual prowess by tagging along his hot girlfriend in the wedding.

Inviting them both will never be a problem, Dory thought. But the situation got complicated when Dory got to talk to her mother.

Telling the mom of her father’s demand, the mother, of course, got really angry. There will be no way she can be at the wedding if her father will bring along his girlfriend. The world seems too tight for the three people.

What should Dory do? It is like asking her who she loves more, her father or her mother?

Adhering to the wedding etiquettes, Dory should not choose one. She should instead strategize to avoid being made to choose.

As a wedding etiquette, fathers and mothers should be in the wedding. For Dory’s case, she just told her mom and dad that they would not want to ruin the occasion just because of a tiny dispute. It worked.

Of course, the mom, the dad, and his girlfriend will never get along, but Dory made sure the three will not meet face to face during the occasion. That way, the wedding moved smoothly. No cakes were thrown and no one screamed at each other.

What if the father’s girlfriend is for the long-term?

Bride’s or groom’s father’s girlfriends are not always on the downside. Sometimes there are these girlfriends who are meant or intended to be long time partners.

If that is the case, wedding etiquettes have it that the girlfriend be invited to the wedding. Anyways, she will be a part of the family soon so she should start her function early.

Make sure the ex-wife and the current girlfriend of the bride’s or groom’s father know that each other would attend so both of them will not be surprised. Remember, it is during surprising moments that hot-tempered women act impulsively.

Short-term or flings

If the father’s girlfriend is apparently just a fling or just a short-term relationship, and if the father’s divorce with the mom is not yet through, explain to the father the situation.

Tell him the sanctity of marriage will be symbolized in the ceremony. Tell him, though it may sound not really nice, that bringing in a date especially since he is not yet totally divorced would degrade the solemnity and sanctity of the sacrament.

Explain that whether you dislike his girlfriend or you do like her, people will still see him married to the mother. So he should spare his girlfriend from embarrassment by not bringing her along. The girlfriend might just feel that she is not invited to the wedding anyways.

Fathers should be more understanding because they are assumed to be more mature and wise. Thus, if you are a bride or a groom in those situations, find the strength to deal with the matter with grace and patience. Be diplomatic and talk it out. This will save you your wedding day.

Selecting the Maid Of Honor

The task of selecting the Maid of Honor is one of the most difficult decisions that has to be made by the bride. The complexity is due to the fact that the duties of the Maid are normally not defined and typically poorly addressed. Every bride actually has her own opinion on what how a Maid of Honor should act. However, communicating these ideas are difficult.

The Main of Honor is commonly perceived as a ceremonial figure that walks behind the bride down the aisle before the bridesmaids. In another light, the Maid of Honor can act, as the one that will help calm a nervous bride, helps in sending out invitations, making sure the registry is properly sent, gives tips on the how the wedding gown should look like and acts as the manager of the bridesmaids.

The Maid of Honor can also host the bridal shower or the bachelorette party. To sum it up, the Maid of Honor is the bride’s closest friend or ally in preparing for the wedding and will always be there during times of need and frustration.

The following are certain etiquette in choosing a Maid of Honor to help minimize stress and maximize pleasure.

The Maid of Honor does not have to be a family member.

It is not a requirement to make a sister or a female cousin the Maid of Honor. A best friend who has been there through thick and thin will likely deserve this distinction.

The bride should instruct the Maid of Honor on her responsibilities.

Brides should communicate what they expect from the Maid of Honor such as making a speech during the reception. Open communication between the two should happen frequently.

Choosing more than one Maid of Honor is not illegal.

The bride should make sure that Maids of Honor have different responsibilities in order to avoid jealousy between them.

The Maid of Honor needs to attend all-wedding activities such as showers and parties for the bride. She will also be tasked to plan and be financially responsible for any bachelorette party and assist in organizing invitations and always be open for favors.

The Maid of Honor’s emotional support is one her integral responsibilities. As the so-called "maid" she is expected to give her full attention to the bride during the wedding day. She should also make sure that the bride is looking almost perfect before they troop down the aisle and constantly check on her condition during the middle and end of the ceremonies up until the start of the reception.

Upon choosing the Maid of Honor, she should be treated out by the bride to a nice dinner or spa to make her feel she is a very important part of the wedding. The Maid of Honor could have a dress designed differently from the other bridesmaids to make her stand out in the entourage.

Etiquette also dictates that the Maid of Honor will wear the groom’s ring on her finger in the absence of a ring bearer. She is also part of the group that will decorate the bridal car and help the bride in wearing the bridal dress.

A wedding ceremony adhered to certain etiquette to make the occasion flow seamlessly and orderly.

- In a semi-private wedding, groomsmen and bridesmaids are given certain responsibilities in helping the bride and groom during the wedding day.

- The bridesmaids should be younger than the bride and their dresses should match. Bridesmaid dresses can include more ornaments and should be composed of light and graceful material. Flowers should functions as the chief decoration.

- The wedding dress should be simple but can be attached with small jewels or ornaments. The garland and veil should be the most eye-catching.

- Bridesmaids should stay at the bride’s left side during the actual wedding ceremony. The first bridesmaid should hold the bouquet and gloves.

- Bridesmaids can be positioned from the shortest to the tallest in order to be symmetrical. A bridesmaid and groomsman with similar height can be paired.

- The groomsmen are assigned to guide the clergyman and then show him to the couple. The groomsmen should stand at the groom’s right side during the wedding ceremony.